Page 20 of PS. You're Mine

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Chapter 4

Alex

After I jerk off twice while listening to Noelle’s voice, I decide to get out of bed and get something to eat. I could stay in bed all day listening to her and touching myself, but it seems kind of sad to spend my Christmas Eve that way.

I put on some long sweats and a thermal shirt, choosing to dress for bed since it’s getting late. Going over to my stereo, I play the Peanuts Christmas album. I know that if I put on another audio of Noelle, I'll just end up back in bed, stroking myself to her voice. I go to my refrigerator, trying to figure out what I want. I have a big dinner planned for myself tomorrow because I enjoy cooking, and I wanted to do something a little special for Christmas Day. Nothing in my small town would be open anyway, so spending the day reading and eating indoors is on the agenda.

Looking out the kitchen window, I see the sun setting and the snow is coming down heavily. I’m wondering if the power will even hold out for me to cook. Good thing I’ve got plenty of wood and a fireplace with a stovetop to cook on. I prepared for a worst-case scenario, knowing how bad the weather can be this time of year. Two years ago I got snowed in for over a week and had to hike it into town for supplies. I’m not planning on doing that again. Ever.

As I pull out stuff to make sandwiches, I think about how I should get a cat or a dog. Something to keep me company during times like this. I enjoy my solitude and being away from the world, but at times it gets really lonely. When I do go into town, I don’t talk to people unless I have to, and I try to cover up my scars as much as possible. I don’t like people looking at me and wondering what happened. Or worse, feeling sorry for me.


Shaking off that thought, I go back to making myself something to eat. When that’s done, I go over to the living room and sit down in front of the fire. I stare at the flames, thinking about Noelle and wondering what she’s doing right now.

She’s probably with her family like every other normal person. Enjoying her Christmas Eve with loved ones, or maybe going out with friends. Maybe she’ll meet someone while she’s out, someone who can be seen in public with her and who won’t feel the need to hide himself.

I think about what it would be like to spend Christmas with Noelle. If I was whole, and she was mine, I think I’d overdose on Christmas cheer. I’d want to spend all day in bed, cuddled up naked and keeping warm. I’d want to make love to her over and over, only letting her out of bed to make cookies with me and to open presents by the fire. Naked, of course. I’d want to taste every inch of her curvy body, eating her pussy in front of the fireplace. I’d want to fuck her over the kitchen counter so she was covered with flour and sprinkles. I’d drag her outside to make snow angels until she was frozen, and then I’d drag her into the tub and give her a bath until she was warm. I’d hold her close to me that night and whisper in her ear how much I lov—.

“Come on, Alex,” I tell myself, trying to shake off the fantasy. It’s not real, and it never will be. What I have is in my head and nothing more. Thinking I need something to lift my spirits, I walk to my bedroom and grab Noelle’s recording along with my cell phone. I glance down at it as I walk back to the kitchen and freeze when I see a missed call from her.

I don’t think twice as I call her back immediately, wondering how I could have missed it. Oh yeah, I was busy jerking off a couple of times listening to her read dirty books out loud. Jesus, Alex, could you be more fucking lame?

After just one ring, the call disconnects, and I look down at my phone, seeing I’ve got service. I try again and again I get disconnected after one ring. I try five more times and nothing happens. I get a sick feeling in my stomach. What if something happened? What if something went wrong?

I check the time she called and see that it was over three hours ago. I start to worry. Who can I call and talk to? How can I find out if she’s okay? Did I get a family member contact when I had her sign her contract? God, why didn’t I think of something like this happening?

I start to pace the living room, thinking of how to get in touch with her, when I see headlights flash across the room.

“What the fuck?”

Who could possibly be coming to my house? I’ve never had anyone come here, and my family wouldn’t just show up without telling me. Maybe they’re lost. But my driveway is three miles long. Whoever comes down the road this far knows where they’re going.

I go to the hall closet and grab the bat I keep in there. I have a hunting rifle, but it’s in the back of the house and not loaded. Probably not the best place for it in this situation, but I’ve never needed it before.

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