He had to know it wasn’t right to just leave me that way and never even mention where he was going or where he’d been when he did arrive. To him it was like riding to town to grab some cough drops.
I’d thought about hiring someone to follow him and just see where he went, but so far I hadn’t been able to bring myself to really follow through with that. I wasn’t sure if I just didn’t want to know the truth or if I just didn’t want to hate myself for violating that trust.
I retired to the living room and relaxed with a good book and a hot cup of tea. Eventually I went to bed and I thought about the twins and my relationship with their father. Ted… he was going to be a father… I wasn’t sure how that made me feel. He was barely able to be a husband. What type of a father would he make? Was it possible that he could change back to the man I’d married? Did that man still exist?
Or had he never existed? I was facing the truth more each day, and as scary as it was to admit, I eventually found myself believing it.
Ted was not the man who’d made me fall in love with him. Ted was someone else entirely.
I just didn’t know who. But I was going to find out.
Nine Months Later
I swung the golf club hard but smooth trying to make sure that I kept my back even and straight and that my wrists stayed nice and locked in without being too rigid as I continued my follow through. I connected solidly with the ball and watched as it lifted off the tee and sailed far through the air towards the hole. It landed on the green and came to a stop not far from putting distance.
Andrew Brower, one of my newest golfing buddies, congratulated me with a hearty pat on the back. He was one of those guys that had to try to be alpha in everything he did, which included very hard pats on the back that he pretended were soft. They used to piss me off, but I’d gotten past that. Andrew was just that way. Besides the guy had more money than he knew what to do with and he sounded very interested in investing in my motorcycle company I was on the verge of starting up.
After months of trying to find the right investors, I decided to go to the source and start investing in actual riders. A few of my racers had done well and this began the word of mouth about me as a legitimate businessman. Now I was ready to move on to bigger and better things. I was no longer considered a washed up racer who was only ever mediocre to begin with. I knew I could have become great if I’d wanted to invest that much time and work into it, but I’ve always been the kind of guy who likes to go with the path of least resistance. It was far easier this way and it made life that much more enjoyable when you weren’t constantly thinking about competing against anyone else.
“Thanks,” I said putting my driver back into my bag. I slung the bag over my shoulder and started walking towards the ball.
“Why didn’t we get a cart?” Andrew asked.
I laughed. “Because we aren’t that lame that we can’t stretch our legs and walk a bit. It’s good exercise. If you spend too much time sitting, it just destroys your body. We humans are not meant to be sedentary creatures.”
“Ah, I forgot. You are a bit of a science buff, aren’t you?”
I nodded. “That I am. But also history, art, languages—you name it and I’d love to be a recognized expert in it. Think about how many people have no idea about the world they really live in. I don’t want to be uninformed.”
Andrew took off his sunglasses and cleaned the lenses on his shirt. “I hear that, but who has the time to sit around and read so much? I barely had that kind of time when I was in school.”
“Time is something we are all in limited supply of, but don’t forget that I have the same twenty-four hours a day that you do. It’s all about sacrifice and choices.”
“Well, some of us fill our time with business,” Andrew teased.
I very nearly turned and belted him one across the jaw, but I held my anger in check. I’d had to do that a lot lately, and frankly I thought I was starting to get pretty good at it.
“So do I,” I said. “Speaking of which, have you given any more thought to what we discussed before?”
Andrew sighed and coughed, clearing his throat. “I have actually.”