At this point, I was sure he was going to start telling me how wrong this was and send me home, but instead, he offered me his shower and said he’d make breakfast.
When I was done cleaning up, I put his robe on, and made my way up the hall toward his living area. As I got closer, I smelled bacon.
I got to the doorway of his kitchen and stopped to watch him. He was in silky lounge pants and a t-shirt, but he looked as sexy as he did in an expensive suit. He was turning a piece of bacon when he realized I was there. He turned his head and smiled, and my heart squeezed in my chest.
I sniffed the air. “That smells like bacon.”
“It is. I figured after last night you could use some protein and fat to replace what you burned.” His grin was sinfully wicked.
My cheeks felt warm, a sure sign of a blush.
“There’s orange juice and coffee on the table, and I’ll have bacon and eggs here in a second.”
“Do you need any help?”
“I’ve got it all ready. Go sit.”
I went to the table which also was by a large window overlooking the city. I sat and waiting until he brought in a platter full of eggs, bacon and toast.
“You can cook too. You’re a real keeper.”
He flinched, and I regretted my words. I was sure he was afraid I was getting too attached. He wasn’t wrong, but I also knew my desire for more would go unsatisfied.
I sighed. “Sebastian, I know the score here. I’m not going to try to get more than you’re willing to give.” He was willing to give his body, but not his heart.
He sat across from me. “You deserve more, Leah. I’m a selfish asshole for taking pleasure from you. It’s not how sex should be.”
“But it’s okay for you.”
He shrugged and put his napkin in his lap.
“Why would you settle for that? Is it because you had love once and don’t want to betray that?”
He scoffed. “What I had with Valerie isn’t what I’d want for you.”
I sat back in my chair, curious about that comment. Knowing that if I started asking questions, he’d feel interrogated and close up, I served myself some food, and tried to act nonchalant.
“What do you want for me?”
“A good and decent man, who loves you. Who gives pleasure not just to your body but to your soul.”
I stared at him as I took a bite of my bacon, wondering how much further I could go with my questioning before he clammed up. “You didn’t have that?”
His jaw clenched, and he took a sip of orange juice. “Not exactly.”
I went back to eating, so he wouldn’t think I was dying to ask him more about his marriage, when I was, in fact, bursting with questions. “My mom and dad had a great marriage. I’d like that,” I admitted. “But what you describe sounds a little boring.”
He quirked a brow. “Oh?”
“I’d like love and good sex, and to feel fulfilled, but I want excitement too. I want fun and intellectual stimulation. I want to be challenged. I don’t want to settle into a rut for the rest of my life.”
“Is that what your parents had? A rut?”
“Don’t get me wrong, my father and mother loved each other, but I do think she felt a bit unfulfilled in her life. My father’s work took a lot of his time, and much of her life was done in service to supporting him. She was willing to do it, because she loved him. And he knew she was sacrificing, which is probably why he’s dedicating the rest of his life to honoring her by staying clear of other woman.”
“So, you’d be okay if your father fell in love again?”
I nodded. “If she was a good woman. My mother would be all for it. She wanted us to be happy.”
“Do you want marriage and a family?”
“You don’t worry that it will take away from your goals? You’re about to have your MBA. Businesses takes a lot of time, as you’ve learned from your father and working with me. Time that will take away from a family. Do you really think you can be fulfilled in both?”
“My degree and work are my priority now, but that could change. Besides, you and your wife built a business together. You combined both worlds.”
Again, his jaw tensed. “Sort of.”
I cocked my head. Had their marriage not been good? “What do you mean?” I asked hoping I wasn’t stepping over the line.
He stared at me and I was ready for him to end the conversation. Finally, he sighed. “Valerie and I didn’t have a traditional marriage. Everything about us was related to business, including our sex life.”
Huh? “Well, you are in the sex business.” It made sense that their sex life would include their business.