I don’t say anything because what can I say? I can’t form an image of him in my head, but I want to. The door opens again.
“Ok, Cathleen. Are you ready?” he asks. The timbre of his voice is almost too much for me.
“Yes. Mom, you can go ahead and wait outside.” She normally leaves the room when I am being examined. It wasn’t always this way, but she gets so weepy, I can’t handle it. It makes me want to cry too and it’s hard to get your eyes examined when they are full of tears.
“Sure. Make sure someone helps you out,” she says, leaving the room.
“Do you want a nurse in here with us?” he asks.
“I don’t think that’s necessary.” He steps closer to me and I take a deep whiff of him again.
“Cathi,” I say, giving him my nickname. Cathleen is so formal.
“Alright, Cathi. Tell me a little about what you see,” he says chuckling.
“I don’t see anything but blackness.”
“No floaters, no shapes, or shadows?”
“Nope, nothing. Should I be seeing something?” I ask confused.
“That would be ideal.” His fingertips graze my temples, and I gasp. The first time a man has touched me, and it fucking figures that I can’t see the look on his face. Why does his touch even mean anything to me? Over the last few months, I can’t tell you how many doctors have poked and prodded me.
Why him? Why now?
“I understand. Do you think we can still do the surgery?”
“Of course. I just can’t guarantee you will regain your sight in the end, but we will get rid of the cancer,” he says honestly.
“That’s really all I can hope for,” I say shrugging.
“I’m going to do everything in my power to help you, Cathi,” he says earnestly, resting one hand on my shoulder and his other palm holding my cheek. “You’re freezing. Why don’t we move this into my office?”
“Sure. Can you get my mom?”
“I will help you,” he says.
Those four little words tell me all I need to know about this man.
He makes me feel things I’ve never felt before. I squeeze my thighs together and almost moan.
“Are you okay?” he asks helping me up from the comfy chair I’ve been sitting in.
“Perfect, thank you,” I say holding onto his forearm. His sleeves are rolled up and I can feel the soft hairs on his arm. I realize for the first time I’m actually turned on. I was starting to think that there was something wrong with me.
“My office is just through here,” he says opening the door. We walk maybe twenty steps and he opens another door. He leads me to a chair, and I sit down carefully.
Is it insane that I would follow this man anywhere? Probably, but I don’t think I care.
Dr. Wayne Bryant
Son of a bitch, I am about to violate the number two rule in medical ethics. I want this woman more than I have ever wanted anyone in my entire life. Even as a man of science, I still know that there are things beyond my control. Love, at first sight, is one of those things. Cathi is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Her golden red hair shines like the sun. Her freckled skin turns me on more than it should. I’ve already had to excuse myself once to keep my hard-on in check. When I asked her if she wanted a nurse present, her breathy response had me clenching my fists.
Now that I’ve got her in my office, I know the only thing I want to do is fuck her, but in this instance, not for the first time, I am imagining her naked, waiting for me to own her.
I take the seat next to her instead of behind my desk like I normally would. She is so fucking beautiful, but I know that I can’t act on my feelings while she’s my patient, but my Hippocratic oath seems useless at this point. She is the only woman to make me doubt myself and the career I’ve chosen for myself.
I hate to brag, but I am the best at what I do. My specialty is so specific, that only one other doctor in America does it, and we share this office. Dr. Amanda Ryan is just as good as I am with retinal specific surgery. I met Amanda during our residency at John Hopkins. We are friends and nothing more. She is excellent at her job, but she’s terrible with people. It’s a flaw, but she’s aware of it at least.
“Dr. Bryant, I am interested in knowing what our next steps are,” she says. Her calling me “doctor” in that silky, velvety, sweet voice is going to be my undoing. I take another look at her chart, not that I haven’t memorized it.